Luahan perasaan

Assalamualaikum

Dah bersawang dh blog aku ni.. Tiba2 aku decided nk jd kn blog ni as blog luah perasaan pulak..

Lately ni banyak betul dugaan Allah bagi.. Dugaan perasaan to be precise..

Ye, Allah bagi dugaan sebab Allah sayang.. Tapi, sekuat mana pun aku, aku tetap tersungkur gk..

Pendam perasaan sejak 4tahun yg dulu.. Pernah lost contact sekejap, tiba2 dia contact aku semula..

Masa lost contact tu aku banyak kali mimpi dia, and mimpi yg paling aku risau dia contact semula just utk bgtau yg dia nak kawin..

Apa yg aku risau kn selamat ni benar2 jd kenyataan bilamana dia mmg contact aku, we spent much thru phone which is thru wassup.. Ada lah dlm 3 or 4 kali hang out..dia bnyak kali ajak keluar tp aku keep on saying that im busy..

Sampai satu tahap, dia wassup dia ckp "awak, saya nak tunang..doakan saya ye.."

Me was just like seriously u wanna get engage? With whom? He replied with puteri gunung.. I thought he was just joking coz that time each wassup mmg x serious langsung..

And ada skali kitorg keluar pegi mall..we spent time whole day..he never make me feel bored from the beginning I knew him.. Lots of laugh and advices given..yelah, org tua2 kata klu suka suma indah, suma terima..tp hes so different dr lelaki2 yg pernah aku kenal..dia lh lelaki yg aku cri selama ni.. In fact, my whole fmly knew him.. He gave hope..false hope actually..or most probably I did put too much hope on him which he dont like me at all..tp mmg dia bg hope, ayt manis je..on the day yg kitorg last pg mall, dia still giving hope..

Tp, tulah.. Nak dipendek kan cerita hari tu juga he admit that he will get engage on 3rd september 2016.. Marriage date on march 2017.. Luruh hati..everything spoiled!

And today, we went out again but this time with his housemate attending one of his housemate wedding in ipoh.. Before pefi wedding, he ask me to come early and having breakfast with them.. And of course I follow what he ordered.. Im being so stupid actually.. You know that he is someone's fiance but still hope that it wont happened.. Still thinking it was just joke,want to teas me.. But it is real.. Hes really engage with his fiancee.. He told me his wedding date on 9th April 2017.. Allahuakbar.. The news has spoiled my mood whole day.. I cant control my feelings.. I cant control my face expression..I even didnt talk much after I knew the date..

Went to wedding and end with 2hours of karaoke cannot change my mood.. Bidalan melayu kata "makan tak xkenyang,tidur xlena" utk org yg happy.. Tp aku guna peribahasa tu utk menggambar kan pedih nye hati ni.. Mkn kt wedding pn xrasa kenyang.. Karok 2jam pn xrasa lepas walaupun kau nyanyi lagu yg kau selalu bawa yg terpekik terlolong..

Balik wedding pegi seri iskandar..dalam kereta, memang aku,xdpt tahan perasaan..I have to cry.. Have to no matter what.. You have no place to tell ur problem..thats just the best way.. Xpelh, Allah knows better..

Aku xblh kata aku redha..aku xblh kata aku tenang or whatsoever.. Im totally not ok.. 4tahun simpan perasaan akhirnya dia jd milik org..

My  friend said, xpa hang xdpt dia..hang akn dpt/cari org yg sama mcm dia.. Kite serah saja pd Allah..

P/s: awak, moga awak bahagia.. Saya undur diri xnk ganggu perasaan tunang awak sebab saya tau mcm mana sakit nye hati perempuan bila lelaki layan perempuan lain..

POTLUCK

Halooooo..

Assalamualaikum..

Selamat pagiiii..

Awal sungguh hapdet belog kalini..

Alang2 xde keje tunggu job fair buka kul 11pagi

Mari lah hapdet apa yg ptut..

Bersapau tunggu sorg2 pun xelok gk kn..

Nak amik gambo malu puleeee..

Hikhikhik

Ok nak cite semalam pegi ulu yam

Alahh..ulu yam je pun..

U might say that tapiiiii..

Tapiiiiii moment tu yg penting

Xkan dpt kt mana2..

First time buat.and Alhamdulillah suma ok..

Thanks collegue..

U guys memang best..

All the meal was good..

And thanks for the compliment

Red velvet cupcake sedap katanyaaa

Macehhhhh

Nanti kite buat lagi event cenggini tampa kehadiran abg hitam dan kakak ijo..

Kahkahkahkah

Kbai!

Sila layan gambor2 yg ada ye..

Tatatititutu..

JUDGE

BEING JUDGE IN THAT WAY WAS THE BIGGEST MISTAKES MAN

NEVERMIND!

LET ME REMIND YOU!

AKHIRAT ITU ADA

AKHIRAT ITU PASTI

ALLAH ITU WUJUD

BALASAN ITU ADA

JANJI ALLAH ITU PASTI

JUMPA DI PADANG MAHSYAR NANTI

MOGA KAU MERANGKAK MOHON AKU MAAF KAN KAU

TAPI, ITS WAY TOOOOOO LATE

WONT FORGIVE YOU LIAR!

SENTAP

Penah rasa x kena benci dengan bakal mak metua?

and this is what happened to me right now

Apa ntah aku buat

suddenly kena bash habis

aku rsa ank kau yg salag dlm hal ni

but y suddenly aku yg kena??

For these past 6years plus ok je..

But since I started to live in kl

Everythings messed up..

Ank kau main kayu 3 dgn cheq

Habih cheq yg kena mrah..

Apa cite??

Hmm

Xpelh,aku tgk je dlu..

Aku sabar..

Broken heart never heal

I didnt do anything 

But once ive reach the level

U will know which action ill take

No matter who u r

I still can control myself

I still can control my feelings

I still can control my anger

but remember!

im unpredictable!

I can do more worst than u do!

serius shit aku marah gile skng ni!

aku paling hangin bl aku xsalah tp aku kena bash

like hell man!

KONGKONG

Assalamualaikum readers..

lama xupdate blog..maybe around setahun or lebih dr setahun rasanye xupdate apa2..

malas lah nak update..aku bukan kaki blogging sgt pun..dulu buat pun sebab trend..lol

oh btw, cerita sekarang aku dh hbs degree aku..n d 5bulan menganggur..what!!! 5bulan??

but its feels just yesterday aku hbs kn intern aku..

so, sekarang just menghitung hari nak konvo on 3rd december 2014..

oh ye, back to main topic..the topic is KONGKONG.. maksud mengongkong dr TERFAKTAB adalah dari istilah pemerhatian aku ialah membelenggu atau membatasi sesuatu. Dari penafsiran cinta pula bermaksud membelenggu dan membatasi pasangan kita dari melakukan sesuatu iaini dari segi perbuatan, kata-kata dan aktiviti. aku kat sini bukan nak cerita pasal cinta..tapi pasal kehidupan aku skng..

as for ur info, or pd sape2 yg dh kenal aku, umur aku dh 24..dua puluh empat..twenty four..lg beberapa bulan dah nak masuk 25..tapi kehidupan aku skng mcm umur aku 17..haishhh..letih lh..

yes..people might say, kau ppuan..kau kena dgr ckp mak ayh kau.. in fact kau sorg je ppuan dlm fmly kau.. yes..mmg aku dgr..but sometimes aku pun nk masa aku sndri..aku nk buat apa yg aku nk wt..its not just following what they say man... bukan nye nk ckp aku ni nk bebas..seriously NOT..tp aku nk ruang utk aku sndri..

mcm mna ntah nk ckp.. nk jumpa kwn2 pun xbg...nk pg kenduri kwn kawin pn xbg..and even worst, nk buat kek pun xbg..oh!! kehidupan apakah yg aku jalani skng ni..ni td msa aku pg bangi..otw blk, mak aku ckp ayh aku xbg aku pg sorg2 blk perak nk pg amik jubah konvo..what the!!!! halloooooooo...aku dh berulang alik perak-gemencheh for 21/2 years.. plezzz lh...im not kid anymore!!!

im 24!! knp kwn2 suma parents dh bg pelepasan..but aku still xdpt..bapak sedih siakkkkk...smpai kan aku dh fkir, if xbg aku pg sorg, xpg konvo pn aku xkisah..this is serious talk! aku xkisah klu xpg konvo skali pun if i didnt get the permission!

aku pnh ckp dgn ayh aku msa nk mntk permission kuar, im 24..,dh nk msuk 25 dh..but dia blh ckp biar lh smpai 40 skali pn..i was just like YaAllah..sebegini sekali kehidupan aku..seriously mmg teruk gile aku rasa..

mak aku penah sama kan aku dgn ank jiran..ika xmcm tu pun..xde pn nk kuar2 jalan2.. yes, aku akui jiran aku bkn mcmtu.. but at least mak dia terbuka nk dgr apa2 cerita psal ank dia..n yes of course terbuka utk dgr cerita pasal lelaki.. n now dh tunng dh pn bdk tu.. but mak aku??? hmmm..lu pikir lah sndri..selalu gk suruh aku cari laki cpt, tunng cpt..tp dlm msa yg sama perli2 aku ckp kena cri biar mak suka..yg mak terima..klu boleh nk pilot, doctor..adoiiii... speechless nk jwb..smpai tdetik kt hati ni, xkawin pun xpelah..bykkkkkk sgt peraturan smpai sakit kepala otak aku..

ok back to kongkong..aku dh semak gile dh duk umah skng ni..seriously tolong lg bg aku kerja..seriously i need my life back..aku bukan jenis ppuan yg duk umah yg xkuar2 umah..n aku bkn jns ppuan liar or whatsoever pggilan mcmtu..aku jns yg aku nk wt, aku wt..aku bosan, aku kuar lepak dgn kwn2..aku xsuka dikongkong!!!

aku rsa, disebab kan kongkong yg mcmni lh, ank2 memberontak..yes, kongkong itu bagus in a positive side..tp berpada pada lh nk kongkong..im not a kid anymore!!!!!!!!!!! bnda yg ditegah lg aku wt..sbb apa???sbb terlampau dikongkong..yaAllah..tolonglh...xtahan dh rasanye lama2 jd penanggur...

dh lh, xtau nk lepas kn mcm mna lg..seksa jiwa!!!

apa?

baking baking baking..

tu je dalam otak aku skng ni...

xsabar nk blk study week...

nk wt red velvet, nk wt pavlova..

nk try wt macaron...

buku dh beli, vid dri stephanie jawovski dh dwnload..

cuma xde msa je nk wt..

oh ye, nk wt gk brownies..

dh tau techniques yg betul mcm mana nk wt..

warghhhh!!!

cepat lh mggu dpn..

xsabar nk blk..

percaya atau tidak???

aku dh catat record dh 2 bln lbh aku xblk umah..

T___T

aku sgt rindu kan rumah..

sgt rndu kan katilllllll aku...

n the most important is, i miss my parents..

i miss my mom's dishes...

aaaaa...

nk blkkkk...

Y____Y

ok, tetiba meroyan pulak..

dh, ok dh..

nk lipat kain baju..

seminggu punya baju bru lepas basuh xlipat lg memandang kn ada test td..

oh ye, b4 i end up my post..

mohon doa sedekah kan Al-Fatihah pd ayh housemate aku yg br meninggal pd 12 december 2013 aritu..

terima kasih..

=)

comeback!

hola ebelibadiiiiii..

lama betul aku x update blog ni..

last update 29 ramadhan aritu..

lama sgttttttttt...

lepas byk nye social network skng ni aku rsa blog dh mcm aku biar kan...

sian awk blog..

xpe2..lpas ni sy update ok..

xdelah best mana pn cerita yg nk dicerita kan...

tp at least ada gk input nk di isi dlm ni kn..

dri tbiar kosong mcmtu je..

oh ye, bkn skng lh kot nk update cerita2..

bz sgtttttt lah..

final year as degree student ni mmg mencabar jiwa, kesabaran..

kena kental habisssss...

xkental mmg xtau lah...

huhu..

nanti aku update ok..

lama dh xmenulis mengarang merepek bukan2..

one day..

one fine day..

ok, tata titi tutu...